Panda Bandits Take London Score

Toronto, ON, Canada / SayRadio


CCTV Image of the Panda Bandits

Crime doesn’t pay, not for most, but these panda clad robbers may be off scot free. London, England was the setting for this dastardly deed. A dim foggy Lincolnshire night like any other. The eerie gleam of the street lights shone murkily through the mist. The cashier was diligently working away inside the dingy convince store. A couple of young men arrive in the front door, nothing out of the ordinary, except for their attire. “Pandas” she would have thought. Strange, but nothing to be concerned about. Pandas are nice, lovely, gentle creatures. That’s just what these two rapscallions want her to think. They want her guard down, and what a better way than a friendly forest animal. No one ever associates panda bears with sadness or aggression. Then the unthinkable happens.

The pandas pull a gun.

Her life flashes before her eyes. All the mistakes she’s made. All the things she’s never done. Her parents, her friends, her boyfriend. What will they do? Will they be able to go on? She’s never even contemplated death at a real level. But now all of a sudden, this panda bear holds her life in his hands. He could pull the trigger and it would all be over. Staring down the barrel of a gun. Death by panda. That’s a way to go.

The two men start yelling, screaming something, but she’s still in shock. She can’t really hear what words are being yelled. All she hears is muffled growls.

“Give us the money” she hears as she is pulled back to reality. She makes hasty work as she opens the cash and empties every last note into their bag.

They disappear out back out the front door, as quickly as they arrived. It was over and she was still alive.

This was the scene Sunday night. The “Panda Bandits” are still at large as London police request help from the public, using the Panda onesies as their first clue. Searching for anyone who may have found the creative costumes in the trash, or even track down the seller.

Needless to say, London will never be the same, living in fear of these furry fiends, these Panda Bandits.

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